I received another spammy email from someone claiming they could put me on page 1 of Google. That someone was “Alexa Marin” at irevmarketing@aol.com. Here’s how the email read:

Your BUSINESS can be on the front page of Google today before you pay for anyting.

Attention Business Owners!

*******************************************************************************************************************

Reply with your NAME and PHONE NUMBER and a Google expert will contact you to explain our trial offer. We put you
on the front page of Google before you must purchase your marketing solution.

*******************************************************************************************************************

WE PUT YOU ON PAGE #1 OF GOOGLE INSTANTLY AND GUARANTEE CUSTOMERS!!

_______________REPLY WITH NAME AND PHONE NUMBER FOR A FREE DEMO.________________

Our package includes:

 1. THE MOST AGGRESSIVE SEARCH ENGINE MARKETING SYSTEM IN THE WORLD  WITH FRONT PAGE PLACEMENT ON GOOGLE, YAHOO AND BING.
 2. Guaranteed amount of people sent to you every month that need your service.
 3. Website development. (if needed)
 4. Monthly visitor tracking and anylitics systems.
 5. Free online Yellow Pages listing. 

Unfortunately, these types of emails are not uncommon. First of all “anyting” and “anylitics” are not real words, but let’s move on to the meat and potatoes of the issues here:

1. Who controls which pages are ranked on page 1 of Google? Answer: Google.
2. Who controls whether or not your business get’s customers? Answer: The prospective customers (visitors to site).
3. Who gives out the title of  “Google Expert” and what must be done to attain it” Answer: No one, this is a self-given title with nothing to back it up.
4. Who give out the title of “The most aggressive search engine marketing system in the world”? Answer: See #3
5. Who controls the “Guaranteed amount of people sent to you every month that need your service.” Answer: The “people” (aka visitors)

How many times in those 5 questions was the answer “Alexa Marin” or “irevmarketing”? Obviously zero times because Alexa and irevmarketing have absolutely no direct control of any of those things. Does the guarantee make any sense to you? Hopefully you see that it’s total nonsense to guarantee things that are completely outside of your control.

Other things you should consider:

1. Is the claim: “Your BUSINESS can be on the front page of Google today before you pay for anything.” based on SEO or PPC? Answer: I don’t know but it would have to be PPC to have any credibility whatsoever. If that’s the case, it costs money to put “your business” on the front page of Google so are they in the business of losing money?
2. Do you really want an “aggressive” marketing system? Answer: Probably not. Google tends to penalize things that would commonly be called “aggressive.”
3. Can this be true? “We are one of only 4 companies that are certified adwords resellers.” Answer: Hell NO! Read this post and see if you agree that this is just ridiculous

OK so these three items clearly show that this is a scam and a half. Combine that with the first 5 items and the fact that the email was spammed out to begin with and I think it’s pretty clear that you should run away from anything like this.

Of course, if you disagree, I’ve got some really affordable, insiders-only deals on ocean-front property in Colorado that you should take advantage of…